Titanium
by LOVIN'themSKITTLES
Summary: Song!Fic. Strong as Titanium, he needs to be, in order to survive being the Tenth Vongola Boss and not going crazy... one-shot


**Song!Fic: Titanium**

**Hey Guys! Just wanted to post this one shot really bad on ff. The song is amazing and David Guetta is freakin awesome:) Also slight Gokutsuna. About my other stories... yes i will be continuing them even though I haven't posted anything in almost a year, and you guys are probably like WTF? Why are you posting this crap and not working on those other stories. Welll I'll get right on that, this I swear! **

**Anyways don't Own the song Titanium, David Guetta does. and Tsuna:) Enjoy!**

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_You shout it out_  
_But I can't hear a word you say_

I rub my eyes. Another sleepless night, screaming into my pillow wishing all this would just go away. I sigh to myself. That would never happen. It couldn't happen, not in this world of fighting and killing and sadness and madness. I get up from my chair, as you walk in, probably to check on me, to make sure I don't do anything crazy like jump out of my window... like last time.

Escape. A word I desperately yearn for, ache for even. I've mentioned this to you so, so many times, but you just laugh and say, "But you are juudaime, and I'm your right-hand man, we couldn't leave if we tried." Even so, your eyes still say something else. I know this, and yet I can't help but wonder what it would be like outside of this prison, just like it was all those years ago. You and I, and all our friends just living in the moment, never worrying, because we all knew we had each others backs. Some more than others... (Murkuro, Hibari) Too bad I can't seem to remember those peaceful days. Now, in this still new world to me, I fight to save my arse, just like everyone else, and because of this, it kills me inside every day.

I think you've noticed this, and you've tried to reach out to me like everyone else. It won't work, it can't work, because I'm too far gone to realize, and I know that that is what kills you inside. No matter how much you shout, it will never reach these deaf ears.

_I'm talking loud not saying much_  
_I'm criticized but all your bullets ricochet  
You shoot me down, but I get up_

I'm sorry I'm this way, so weak, and I cant help but ask myself,_ Why are you still by my side? _I look up and gaze into those eyes, searching for my answer, and of course your eyes are as unreadable as ever. I slouch into my chair, and sigh.

I want to voice my thoughts, but I'm too scared to hear you answer. I'm a failure of a boss. An undecisive, impulsive retard of a boss, and yet here you are. Even after all the messes I made and all the lives that have been lost because of me you're still here! I have no clue why and it makes me mad.

Honestly, I don't think I've grown much over these past ten years. I still feel like the same scared fourteen year old I was back then. Except now when I screw up, not only am I affected by it, but everyone I care about is too, and it sucks. I guess Reborn was right, I am a good for nothing. Hah, its actually pretty funny, now that I think about it. All those years of being criticized, and bullied, and abused, I thought I was just to pathetic to do anything about it. Now, I'm 24, and I feel way more pathetic than I did back then.

Ironically, I still remember the day you decided to 'drop by' challenging me, and how I was going to pee my pants. I don't know what I did, but after that day we became best friends, and still are, and I'm so thankful for this I could scream. I smile at the memory and you look at me questioningly, probably because you haven't seen me smile in awhile.

If I never met you that day, I'd most likely be dead or locked up somewhere for the mentally impared. You were my support system, and I was yours. We were a team, all the things we went through before I became boss, we protected each other, making sure nothing bad happened. Time and time again enemys have tried to shoot me down, but I got up and fought, but only because of you. But now that I'm the boss, I feel like were not as close, with you going on secret missions you cant tell me about, and me being stuck in my office all day doing paper work, we've drifted apart as friends.

_I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose_  
_Fire away, fire away_  
_Ricochet, you take your aim_  
_Fire away, fire away_  
_You shoot me down but I won't fall_  
_I am titanium_  
_You shoot me down but I won't fall_  
_I am titanium_

There are only a few moments in my short life, where I feel I've accomplished anything. Most of them included you.

I sigh again, and pull out my mittens and stare at them. I don't even notice when you walk up next to me to whisper in my ear. "You've been spacing out a lot, what are you thinking about?"

I don't even flinch, just turn my head to look at you, and say that its nothing important. Suddenly, you get angry at this. Putting a hand on the chair, you spin it so I'm facing you fully. A look of shock appears on my face.

"What's happened to you Juudaime?" You ask me, and all I can do is just stare back at you blankly. I knew what you meant, but I didn't no what to say. Was I suppose to say that I don't like being the tenth? I can't do this anymore? I miss you? Oh, God no, especially not the third one. No, I cant be weak. Not in front of my guardians, not in front of Reborn, and defenitely not in front of you.

So I muster up the best fake smile I can, and say, "I don't know what your-"

"Yes you do!" He shouts.

_Cut me down  
But it's you who have further to fall  
Ghost town, haunted love  
Raise your voice, sticks and stones may break my bones  
I'm talking loud not saying much_

"Please, just listen to me. You've changed since you became the tenth. You never smile, and when you do, it never reaches your eyes. You've gotten paler, and skinnier, and you never leave your office. Everyone is worried, Juudaime!" Your voice a little quieter now. "Especially me. I hate standing by your side, watching you slowly fall apart." All of a sudden, this burst of anger rushes through me. I didn't realize how much anger and emotion I kept bottled up until I exploded.

"I'm the boss of Vongola! I need to take care of everything, and make sure nothing goes wrong! I need to protect everyone, its my duty as the tenth!" I scream, but keep going when I realize I still have some anger left, "I'm in my office everyday, never eating because I need to make sure all our allies are alright, and that they know what's going on, and that everyone is at the top of their game to keep this place up and running." You look like you're about to say something, but I cut you off instead. "I-I'm tired of all of this, but I can't let all of you down!"

_I'm bulletproof, nothing to lose  
Fire away, fire away  
Ricochet, you take your aim  
Fire away, fire away  
You shoot me down but I won't fall  
I am titanium  
You shoot me down but I won't fall  
I am titanium  
I am titanium  
I am titanium_

I don't even realize I'm crying until you reach out and wipe away the tears. My voice shuts down, and now I'm just crying. I'm beyond embarrassed for letting you see me like this, but for some reason when I look up and you're smiling at me, relief washes over me. I guess I'm just glad you didn't call me pathetic.

You pull me out of my chair and into your arms, and I return the hug gladly, sobbing into your shoulder. You pet my mop of a hair, and whisper soothing words to calm me down. When I finally pull away, my face turns beat red.

"T-that was, uhh. I'm sorry I yelled at you." I look down at my feet, too embarrassed to look him in the eyes. You put your forefinger and thumb under my chin, and tilt my head to look at you.

Stone-hard, machine gun  
Firing at the ones who run  
Stone-hard, those bulletproof glass

"About fucking time you said something." I look at you shocked and you just laugh. "I've been trying to get you to tell me what's wrong for so long."

"Why did you wait so long, why didn't you just give up." I asked, and you looked appauled.

"I would never give up on you Juudaime! I'm your right-hand man!" He cried. "But no matter what I said you pushed me away. It's not good to keep everything bottled up like that. Also, you don't have to carry all the burdens on your shoulders. Me and all your guardians are here for you. "

I smiled and hugged you again. A wave of tiredness rushed over me. I guess keeping all those emotions inside really was tiresome. I yawned and said I was going to take a nap, and sat back down in my chair. I gently closed my eyes and drifted off to sleep. Before completely dozing off I felt something soft press against my forehead, and barely opened my eyes to see your face inches from mine and I blushed slightly. I closed them again and smiled to myself.

_You shoot me down but I won't fall  
I am titanium  
You shoot me down but I won't fall  
I am titanium  
You shoot me down but I won't fall  
I am titanium  
You shoot me down but I won't fall  
I am titanium  
I am titanium_

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**Review please! Much appreciated :)**


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